Dear Jake,
Today I read in my weekly tabloid that everyone can defeat the Devil if we use the same methods as Captain Kirk used to defeat bad guys in Star Trek. Is this true?!? Do you think that we could defeat the “Prince of Darkness” with space age style of tactics?
Sincerely, Tlohnierb Imim
Answer–
Wow! I never realized what a cool name Tlohnierb is! T– your tabloid is partially correct when they say that Star Trek methods could be used to beat El Diablo in a fight. The mistake comes in, when they claim that James T. Kirk is the one who has the skills to do it. Kirk against ‘ol scratch wouldn’t even be a contest. It would be like the time that Kirk tried to paddle across the living room with a wooden fork, he wouldn’t even make it half way before some kitchen of the sea fell out of his pants. Dr. Spock on the other hand, has all of the skills necessary to emerge from such an encounter victoriously. Being that Spock is a Vulcan, he is nearly immortal and is able to use the Vulcan death grip. This is a maneuver that the Beastie Boys so keenly observed is “like a pinch in the neck.” One swift pinch in the neck from Dr. Spock and the fight would be over. So, to answer your question, yes it is true that the Prince of Darkness can be beaten by using space age tactic, unfortunately us humans do not possess the ability to deploy these tactics. Those freakin’ tabloids love to stretch the truth.
Live Long and Prosper, Jake T.
