My morning commute never fails to provide entertainment in one way or another. Today I came across this poster for the first time. Being that it is my first time on the “A” train in 10 days, it may have been up for a while already. At first glance, I thought it was a fairly witty attempt of album promotion. On closer inspection, I realized that the poster was product of Kanye teaming up with Absolut Vodka. Why on Earth anyone would want a self absorbed prick to endorse their product, is a mystery to me. It is even more mystifying when done in the fashion portrayed on the ad. Apparently Absolut wants you to believe that if you are a balding, slightly overweight, middle aged white guy, drinking their vodka will make you “Be Kanye.” Hmmmmm… Let’s anylise this for a second. Below are my predictions regarding the likelihood that after imbibing Asolut, the BSOMAWG mentioned above, will gain the following Kanye West-like attributes:
- Will land a multi-million dollar record deal with Rocafella: not a chance
- Will escape a serious car accident, resulting a broken jaw: quite possible (can’t say the same for the person that you run into)
- Will show up carelessly late to important obligations: very likely
- Will sing childishly simple melodies horribly off key, despite years of vocal coaching and hundreds of studio takes: very feasible, even without the coaching
- Will make racially charged, self effacing statements in public: strong chance
It is pretty clear that Absolut’s message to all of the BSOMAWGs out there, is: drink our booze and you will turn into a no-talent loudmouthed jerk, just like Kanye West.